Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Part 5: It's All Fun and Games Until Sombody Loses a Uterus (1)

It was a four-hour surgery where Dr J removed uterus, ovaries and lymph nodes in the groin and near the aorta. I'll get pathology results in a week or two, but he said he didn't see anything alarming. Of course, that's what they said about my cervix too, so hopefully I don't have some kind of mutant stealth cancer. Anyway I was in at 6:30 am and out at 8:30pm the same day. Yes folks, radical hysterectomy is now an outpatient procedure. Not even any stitches or bandages - they super-glued me closed and sent me on my way.

This is me about an hour after I woke up

Even with cool robotic surgery and delicious narcotics afterwards, hysterectomies hurt. The incisions are much higher than I expected, but I'll spare you the gruesome photos.  I have bruises in some unexpected places and I try not to think about what position they had me in while I was out.

Catheters are extremely annoying and I'm every bit as creeped out by it as I'd thought I be.

Catheters are creepy

 Also I haven't had cotton-mouth like this since that experimental period in the 1970's.
Ice chips please

I did get some lovely hospital jewelry.

That's my ID band (with a barcode!) and two allergy alerts.

Fancy leg warmers/massagers and booties



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