Part 4: Radical Hysterectomy is the Name of My Next Band.

Squick Alert: If you are particularly squeemish about medical stuff, or in any way upset that I'm discussing my Lady Business in a relatively public way, then maybe you should stop reading and go do something else.

I went in to see Dr J for a follow-up exam from the cone biopsy. He's quite pleased with how well I've healed and said "If I hadn't performed the procedure myself I would never have guessed you had a biopsy." I'm adding 'Speed Healing' to my list of Super Powers along with 'Growing Hair' and 'Matching Black Socks'.

Dr J confirms that I have Stage 1A2 cervical cancer and we've scheduled a radical hysterectomy for May 22. I was doing pretty well with the Cautions and Warnings and Gruesome Descriptions of Robotic Laparoscopic Part Removal right up until he casually mentions the post surgical catheter I'll need for a week.

WHAT!?

Go figure. The guy is going to Hoover out my lady parts with a robot-assisted medical vacuum and the thing that really freaks me out is a tiny little bladder tube for a few days.  I've been assured that it's not that big a deal, but I can't help but think of aquarium tubing and I get queasy all over again. I tried looking for a picture...forget it. Look it up yourself.
I'll spend the next couple of weeks getting ready for the Great Confinement, which mostly entails cleaning my house so that I can stand to be in it for a couple of weeks. Yeah, this would be the downside to my relaxed attitude about housekeeping.

Intro: About My Lady Business...

Part 1: Going Medieval on the Girly Goodies

Part 2: I'm not getting older - my doctors are getting younger

Part 3: You're Going to Feel a Little Pinch

Interlude: And We Are Dangerously Short On Chocolate

Part 4: Radical Hysterectomy is the Name of My Next Band.

Interlude: Lessons in Perspective

Interlude: What Have You Got to Lose?

Part 5: It's All Fun and Games Until Somebody Loses a Uterus

It Takes a Village to Kick Cancer's Ass 

Part 6: The Catheter and the Hat