I went in for my pre-admission screening and after updating the family medical history another century, the nurse-practitioner asks if I have any questions. I tell her about my obsession over the catheter and she also reassures me that it's no big deal.
"I had one when I had my hysterectomy in 1993," she tells me. "In fact I even went on a date wearing it. Of course I kept talking about it which pretty much guaranteed the relationship was going nowhere. I will tell you that it's entertaining to empty the bag in a public restroom, because you do it facing the the toilet. Make a big deep throat-clearing noise and convince the person in the next stall that you're a transvestite."
Now I'm looking forward to crossing 'Pee Standing Up' off my Bucket List.